Jack TenneyExtra Point

by Jack Tenney, Publisher

January 2006

Ode to January

Tree’s still up.

Needles aren’t.


Fuel bills.




Frozen pipes.

One glove.

Misty windshield.

Battery jumper.

Football overload.


17 misdated checks.

Frozen paint cans in garage.

Breeze from somewhere.

Frozen hose.

Frozen outdoor decorations.

Electric bills.


Short blankets.

Lost hat.

Carpet soiled.

No parking.

Spinning tires.

Headlights dirty.

Tow trucks.

Green wood.


Flight delays.



Other glove found.

First one now missing.

Breeze persisting from somewhere.

Four scrapers in other car.

Plow closed drive again.

Deaf dog out at midnight.

Golf ball in toe of boot.

Dog scratching at 2 a.m.

Cold tile.

One slipper.

Snowing hard.

Feathers falling out of old parka.

Definite breeze from somewhere.

Steps iced.

Another notice to dig out mailbox.

Carpet really grungy.

Hurricane-force wind from  electric plug.

Slow leak in snow tire.

Sand specks eating paint.

Salt eating  muffler.

Dog eating roast.

Canceled checks from 1987 missing.

Found first glove in gym bag.

Left hat somewhere.

Golf ball in toe of ski boot.

Broke credit card cleaning windshield.

Scarf with gloves ... somewhere.

Coat pocket full of buttons.

Can almost hear breeze from somewhere.

Blew diet.

Skis frozen in rack.

Frozen door lock eats part of key.

Golf ball in toe of sneaker.

Limp worse.

Wiper blades frozen midship.

Spilled coffee on neck warmer.

Rear window defrost blew fuse.

New bindings loose.

Followed plow for world-record distance.

Nozzle frozen on windshield washer.

Defrost clogged.

Breeze getting stronger.

Down to barbecue spatula in glove box.

Three cans of dead tennis balls in trunk.

Plow closed drive again.

Snowing harder.

Breeze constant on back of neck.

Guy called ... lawnmower’s ready.

Vermont ... a way of life.

Gee, I love it.

Happy New Year! 

Ed. note: This Ode to January first appeared in our January 1988 issue. Some things never change.